Re: Normandy - Tastefully Refined Genocide
"Sir!" Your General shouts, scared shitless. "They've breached the perimeter. They're nearing the compound!"
Well, Your Majesty, your reign of terror is ending. The revolution has begun and the freedom fighters have brought enough weapons and supplies to easily supplant you. As you sit at your desk, hearing the thunderous roar of artillery fire and the rapid cracks of automatic weapons fire, you hang your head in shame. At this point, you have exactly three options. Order your men to stand their ground. Sure, they'll take out a few hundred revolutionaries before they fall, but they will fall. You could suck start that gold-plated Desert Eagle you keep at your hip, or could turn-tail and run. Personally, I recommend the third.
So, take your 4 most trusted men, a fuck load of munitions and cram them into your getaway car. "But what about all their jeeps and shit?" You'll ask me nervously...
Introducing the Normandy Valentine. A 4-door Presidential Escape Vehicle. Including several advanced options for today's Tyrant on the go.
The body is made of a blend advanced Carbon fiber layers, between which is filled with a high grade non-Newtonian fluid.
The glass is, of course, bullet proof.
The tires are made of our experimental, high tensile strength, airless polymer, with carbon fiber interweave.
All of this means, the Valentine can resist sustained small arms fire for nearly five minutes.
The interior is, of course, tastefully upholstered with stain resistant leather.
There are cubby holes everywhere for arms and ammunition.
Our state of the art GPS
And our premium 12 speaker sound system.
Lets not forget the engine. A 6.0L DOHC-48 V12 producing 750 HP, bolted to an AWD 7-speed automatic gearbox. 0 - 62 is achieved in 2.9 seconds, and onward to a top speed of 217 MPH. It even gets a decent 16 MPG.
All of this can be yours for a meer $650k.
Well, Your Majesty, your reign of terror is ending. The revolution has begun and the freedom fighters have brought enough weapons and supplies to easily supplant you. As you sit at your desk, hearing the thunderous roar of artillery fire and the rapid cracks of automatic weapons fire, you hang your head in shame. At this point, you have exactly three options. Order your men to stand their ground. Sure, they'll take out a few hundred revolutionaries before they fall, but they will fall. You could suck start that gold-plated Desert Eagle you keep at your hip, or could turn-tail and run. Personally, I recommend the third.
So, take your 4 most trusted men, a fuck load of munitions and cram them into your getaway car. "But what about all their jeeps and shit?" You'll ask me nervously...
Introducing the Normandy Valentine. A 4-door Presidential Escape Vehicle. Including several advanced options for today's Tyrant on the go.
The body is made of a blend advanced Carbon fiber layers, between which is filled with a high grade non-Newtonian fluid.
The glass is, of course, bullet proof.
The tires are made of our experimental, high tensile strength, airless polymer, with carbon fiber interweave.
All of this means, the Valentine can resist sustained small arms fire for nearly five minutes.
The interior is, of course, tastefully upholstered with stain resistant leather.
There are cubby holes everywhere for arms and ammunition.
Our state of the art GPS
And our premium 12 speaker sound system.
Lets not forget the engine. A 6.0L DOHC-48 V12 producing 750 HP, bolted to an AWD 7-speed automatic gearbox. 0 - 62 is achieved in 2.9 seconds, and onward to a top speed of 217 MPH. It even gets a decent 16 MPG.
All of this can be yours for a meer $650k.