Previous roll:
posting.php?mode=edit&f=20&p=71486strop:Try to convince the nurse that I am a doctor. This will get me seen much faster. And possibly treated better too.You roll a: 2-Is it this guy again? - one nurse said.
-Nah, the guy that claimed to be the Director had pink hair. And a creepier smile.
-Let's check him
After some psychological evaluations, the staff has determined you don't really believe you are a doctor, or even The Doctor, and you get put back in your hospital bed.
BeforeLifer:Set/fix nose and see if can find some books on the horned guy who tried to take my beloved fluffyYou roll a: 3Well, the nose might require a professional to set. I mean, you were able to position it in less painful position, and regained 1 HP by doing so, but it's not perfect yet. As for the horned guy, the books you have do not get into specifics. the horned fella is supposedly a devil, supposedly lives in hell, and you can supposedly get into there by commiting bad deeds.
Leonardo9613use my new found martial art skills to attack the damn creatures.You roll a: 3You were unsure of whether your martial art skills existed or were just an illusion. Unsure you made your first blow, and punched some of the Pokemons. (-2 HP to the swarm). Hmm... Maybe it actually works? I mean, you did not put enough confidence into it, because you feel like it can do more, but...
JasonPoland:All 6 Pokémon team up to attack the RattatasYou roll a: 5The 5 remaining Pokemons left their Pokeballs - Ralts, Bellsprout, Squirtle, Growlithe and that creepy dude so obsessed with his mother he wears her skull. The puppy Fire-type Pokemon jumped into the action first, biting into one of the Rattatas' head, and crushing his opponent's neck. The water Kanto starter followed into the action, and smacked another one away with his tail. Then, the emotion feeling Pokemon, Ralts, directed her yet weak telekinetic force, hurting, and confusing the shit out of another Rattata, causing it to attack another one. Immediately afterwards, another close mouse pokemon got cut by vines emerging from incredibly thin and flexible body of Bellsprout. Cubone was the last to attack. He scanned the fight, and then promply approached one of the opponents. He growled something to the Rattata, took his mother's femur and began smashing it into the head of his poor victim. The Rattata's skull gave in after 2 hits, but Cubone still was putting the bone into the motion, until the Rattata was barely recognisable as a Pokemon at all.
(Swarm loses 4 HP)
Some Rattatas began beeping something towards your pocket monsters, and you noticed something was wrong, as the looks of uncertainty formed on your allies. Are the Rattatas trying to turn them against you?
EnryGT5:Wield my branch strongly and jump in the middle of the swarm while screaming random expletivesYou roll a: 2You held the branch with a firm grip, and made a nice jump into the swarm of Rattatas. And, contrary to what the number on the die says, you actually succeeded. Nice. You are now in middle of swarm trying to kill you. Now what...shit...cunt, FUCK! YOU HAVE NO PLAN!
-WHAT A MOTHERFUCKING IDIOT I AM - you think
-See, that's why we are superior species - one Rattata says.
ROLL TO DODGE the swarm's attack!
You roll a: 5They, the superior species? Pfff.... You jump back into your previous position, and notice your charge disrupted the swarm's position. You evaluated their current positional weaknesses, have your branch ready to attack, and have thus +1 to your next attack. This obviously was your plan from the very beginning and who says otherwise is a liar.
conan:Run over pyrlixYou roll a: 3You slowly creep from your place. That phonograph sure weighs a lot. As you accelerate towards the guy who turned you into this piece of shit, you realise you are not going to carry enough speed to harm him, so you think, think, and come up with an idea to drive over his foot instead.
Pyrlix,
ROLL TO DODGE Conan-Cossack 1000! (+1 due to conan's slowness)
You roll a: 2+1 = 3Whoa, what is this NOISE! As you turn around, you notice a pile of rust rolling towards you. Does not seem to be much of a threat, so you ignore it, until it gets close. You move away a bit, as you notice it wants to run you over. It then tries to back off, and you're forced to dodge the car once more. This makes you miss the bus (Your action was interrupted)
Spitfire599:Run back to the tree where we all started at and tell everyone there about my theory.You roll a: 4You get back to there quickly, and share your hypothesis with everyone who is there. Sure, there only seems to be the Phantom Hitler, two people fighting with him, and some guy landing with the help of his jacket, but they heard you very clearly.
Madrias:Attempt to use the jacket to either glide or parachute to relative safety.You roll a: 5Your fiddling with jacket must have done something to your aerodynamics, since you were quickly thrown out of the tornado. You glided above some people fighting what appeared to be some oversized purple mice, and landed gracefully right behind... A ghost hitler. Huh. By the way. You seem to have mastered the gliding dynamics with this jacket, and as long as you have it, you will automatically pass any ordinary gliding tests.
PhillipM:Grab the staff out of the ground and head for the road to put some space between me and Hitler.You roll a: 2While you were running for the staff, Hitler closed his eyes, spread his arms, and said:
-Peace is key. Peace of mind zat is. Blitzkrieg rules everyvere else.
And the staff nudged and flew back into his hand
-Let's fight. - he then aimed a shot at you, but then collapsed on the ground, obviously stunned.
Pleb:Step back in awe/fright..You roll a: 6Huh. Let's see... The button began glowing back again. The B embossed into it actually dazed you at first. With squinted eyes, you noticed the button disintegrated into dust, and only the glowing B remained. Soon, another letters started appearing, forming BEELZEBUB glowing in the air. Suddenly, cracks formed under your feet. This did not look well.
ROLL TO DODGE whatever that is.
You roll a: 4You stepped back again. Just in time, I'd say, as a hole opened in the ground, with a giant, red, horned guy emerging from it. He held a bong in one hand, and some weed in the other
-Duuuude. You, like, found my doog. - he said while setting his bong and smoking his herbal substances - This is the best shit ever - you were not quite sure whether he meant you finding the dog or his weed.
-Wait, so whose dog is it? Yours or that dude's over there?
-...Yeees.
T16:Mess with the A55 Wankel's settings and take another shot at Hitler.You roll a: 5You find some switches, and decide to flip one of them. You aim your gun at Adolf, pull the trigger, and Hitler immediately gets stunned and falls onto the ground, losing 1 HP in progress. Now, it's not everything. He seems to be stunned for serious, and it seems he'll be out of commission for, I don't know, three turns?
titleguy1:Get help for my arm. It hurts.You roll a: 3While the village does not seem to have any clinic, you found a person that claimed to know first aid. The person in question said it's been infected by a vile force, and poured some holy water onto it. Then he poured some high purity alcohol onto it. And then, he said...
-It needs to be burnt off with fire. - and he ignited the fumes of the alcohol with a lighter.
Your arm hurts like shit now, (-1 to any next action). However, as you look at the wound, you see it might actually HAVE WORKED. (You regain 4 HP)
cpufreak101: try pull starting the generator on the Motorhome, then try charging my phone.You roll a: 5You do not know what happened. That much is clear. You do not know when and how you got here. You do not know when and how you crashed. Most importantly, you do not know when and how in the world you installed a nuclear reactor in your motorhome. However, that's what you have there. You can even start charging the phone there.
Character info:
Player Characters:
strop
HP: 32/40
Equipment: None
Allies: BITT
Extra: -1 to using the left leg, +1 to A55 Wankel laser blaster operation.
titleguy1
HP: 36/40
Equipment: None
Extra: None
Conan-Cossack 1000 (conan)
HP: 36/40
Equipment: Cursed Alfa ring.
Extra: Is now a car, -1 to convincing people he's a good car.
pyrlix
HP:40/40
Equipment: Pouch full of old golden coins
Extra: +1 to dodging magic attacks (force field)
EnryGT5
HP:38/40
Equipment: Branch
Extra: +1 to raw strength rolls
PhilipM
HP:39/40
Equipment: None
Leonardo9613
HP: 40/40
Equipment: A belt of martial arts prowess (rerolls epic fails during fights, once per turn)
Evardsen (T16)
HP: 38/40
Equipment: A55 Wankel laser blaster, bulletproof vest (less damage from bullets)
Extra: +1 to freeing yourself.
BeforeLifer
HP: 37/40
Equipment: Gas pistol
Extra: +1 to handling dogs.
Spitfire599
HP: 40/40
Equipment: None
Pleb
HP: 40/40
Equipment: A weird button-shaped thing, A pocket dimention of infinite cookies.
JasonPoland
HP: 40/40
Allies: Shuckle
Equipment: Shuckle's pokeball
nerd
HP: 40/40
Equipment: None
Extra: In a New Beetle trunk. Trapped.
Madrias
HP:40/40
Equipment: Gliding jacket (automatic pass to ordinary gliding)
cpufreak101
HP:40/40
Equipment: Crashed Nuclear Motorhome
NPCs:
BITT (Bogliq Industries Two Thousand)
HP:60/60
Equipment: None
Phantom VW Adolf Hitler
HP:14/30
Equipment: None
Extra: Transformed into a VW New Beetle partially, stunned (3 turns remaining)
Elderly gentleman Roland met
HP:25/25
Equipment: None
Fluffy the demon doggie.
HP:15/15
Equipment: None
A swarm of Rattatas
HP:25/40
Equipment: None
Extra: Swarm - Attacks do less damage to them, unless they're some sort of area attacks
JasonPoland's Pokemon creatures (Shuckle, Cubone, Ralts, Growlithe, Squirtle, Bellsprout)
HP:10/10 each
Equipment: None
Beelzebub
HP:50/50
Equipment: Bong, Weed
Extra: Stoned