Speedemon:
Throws maple syrup at wolfYou roll a:
4You throw the bottle successfully.
You feel a tremor and see a tree fall in your direction.
Roll to dodge a tree:
6You are a dick to trees. You punch the tree, splitting it in half.
---
cpufreak101: Beg the wolf to stop attackingYou roll a:
6You do beg the wolf so loudly, someone else hears that. Someone up in the heavens.
"The gods of Roll to Dodge do not approve of you being a little bitch, cpufreak101" you hear a voice from the sky.
Roll to dodge a divine retribution:
2Welp. 8 HP left.
Also, there's a tree coming in your direction.
Roll to dodge a tree:
3The tree falls near you, and a branch hits you. 3 HP left
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SkylineFTW97: Looks for everyone elseYou roll a:
3Eh. You do find only one person. A birdman with his little Pokebuddy. You also find a tree on a collision course with you.
Roll to dodge a tree:
3You dive out of the way, but faceplant hard, as you hit a rock. -5 HP
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Vri404: Looks for bird foodYou roll a:
6You find a venomous snake. Some birds of prey eat these.
Roll to dodge the snake's attack:
6The snake jumps towards you, trying to bite you. You bitch slap it, killing it instantly. Now let's see what you can do about that tree that's about to fall on you.
Roll to dodge a tree:
2Ouch. Not good. You'd lose 10 HP, but your new fiery friend has pulled you to safety.
---
Leonardo9613: Follows conan and pyrlixYou roll a:
2...The tracks of conan and Roland vanished rather quickly for an untrained eye. You, you are not a trained tracker, so... nope, you got lost.
On top of that, that guy who got into your car is now having some sort of attack.
If that was not enough, a tree is about to hit you.
Roll to dodge a tree:
2There goes the pristiness of the Leomobile. The roof has caved in from the impact, and the car is stuck. Good news is, it is a good enough shelter and you and the passenger only lose 3 HP.
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titleguy1: Gets into the LeomobileYou roll a:
6Wat. What am I supposed to do here? Ok, roll to see if you have an allergy to Brazilian Ford Ka plastics.
Roll to dodge allergy: 1
You do. Oops. -10 HP, with -2 HP for every turn you remain in here.
Also, you lose 3HP, since Leo failed to dodge a tree.
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AirJordan: Tries to bring the forest down with a stomp.You roll a:
5Oh my. You stomp, and trees are falling right and left. Everyone in the forest except you has to roll to dodge now.
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Madrias: Tries to obtain a weapon.You roll a:
6You find a laser pistol. In an attempt to examine it, you accidentally take the safety off.
Roll to dodge accidentally shooting yourself:
4You quickly put it back on, and notice it has multiple operation modes: "daze", "blind", "hurt". Nice.
Your sensors indicate a tree about to fall on you.
Roll to dodge a tree:
3In the process of dodging the tree, you trip, and hit the ground with a loud thump. You lose 5 HP.
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EnryGT5: Asks for helpYou roll a:
3You asked for help successfully, but nobody came.
Also, a tree is about to fall on you.
Roll to dodge a tree (at -1, since you're stuck): 1-1=0
You know how every car is a Pinto in fiction? Well, a Trailblazer is a car, so... You are at the center of a nice explosion, lose 18 HP, have a Chevy fragment in your stomach (and lose 2 HP due to bleeding every turn). Trailblazer Hut is no more.
You are not stuck anymore though.
--
nerd:
Tries to drive the Galant into the hut.You roll a:
3You get into the car.
"Where do you want to go?" It asks?
"Trailblazer Hut"
"It's...right there." The car points itself towards the house you have collapsed.
And it exploded now.
Also, a tree falls on the car, but the car tanks the impact.
---
rcracer11m: Leaves the vicinity of the Nazi bunkerYou roll a:
2Before you can leave, the ground shakes, and a tree falls in front of you. Another one follows. This time it's more accurate.
Roll to dodge a tree:
4You get out of the way safely.
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strop: Tries to retrieve the cpufreak's arm from the wolf.You roll a:
3You grab the arm, however, you could not get the grip right. Wolf gets +1 to dodging this thievery attempt.
(The wolf succeeds and gets a counter on top of that.)
You get bitten in the hand. -4 HP. Also, a tree is falling on you.
Roll to dodge a tree: 6
Since you are the only ninja here, the ninjitsu got concentrated in you, and you kicked the tree back into its place.
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conan: Travels to Forest FrontiersYou roll a:
5You are in. Turns out you are the 2000th guest to ever visit the park, and get a coupon granting you free entry to any ride.
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JasonPoland: Runs home to check if his Pokemon are thereYou roll a:
2Well, the only building nearby is not your home. And it has just exploded.
Also, there's a tree coming towards you.
Roll to dodge a tree:
6You kick the shit out of the tree. Poland stronk.
---
koolkei: Equipment check time!You roll a:
6You reach down a pocket, and feel something pricking you. You pull it out, and see a knife with a poison chamber. Oops, let's see if you stab yourself deep enough for the poison to get into your body.
Roll to dodge poison:
4Nope, just a scratch. And hey, you have a poison knife.
Also, as you wake up, you see a tree about to crush you.
Roll to dodge a tree:
5You now know why you woke up. Your body warned you, and prepared you accordingly. Now, whenever something significantly heavier is going to hit you, you're getting +1 to dodging it.
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pyrlix: Asks people about locationYou roll a:
6"You're in Forest Frontiers."
"Yeah, I know, but what town? Country? Planet?"
"Huh, I don't know..." And then your conversation partner has realised something "I'm merely a guest generated to spend time in this park. I don't exist outside of it. That's so mind blowing"
And then his head exploded.
Roll to dodge the explosion:
4You cover your face. That is roughly enough. This explosion was not so strong.
---
NPC actions:
Siemens-01: Builds a bicycleYou roll a:
5You assemble an excellent bicycle. It has no power losses, has a rider body scanner, allowing it to determine the optimal pedal rpm, and an ideal CVT. A light shines from the sky, and the bike gets divinely inscribed with "Killrob-anerkannt", whatever that means.
"Perfekt" you say.
Alright, enough of celebration - a tree is coming your way.
Roll to dodge a tree:
3You'd dodge it easily, but you had to protect the bicycle as well. You get hit by a branch, and lose 4 HP.
---
The wolf: Runs away with newly obtained food.You roll a:
3Now that you've finally got some food, everyone is pursuant to ruin your life. First, a guy throws something at you.
Roll to dodge the maple syrup bottle:
2Great, now you're glued to the ground. It's so sticky (-1 to movement rolls). Then, a tree falls in your direction
Roll to dodge a tree:
5-1=4You get an adrenaline rush and get out of the way, despite the stickiness. And then, a humanoid equine comes to take your arm from you. Why won't he hunt for his own food. The bastard.
Roll to dodge strop:
6-1+1=6Not only he loses grip of the arm, you manage to get a bite on his hand as well.
---
The hag disappears from the game so far. Saving processing power by not simulating her.
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Torchic: Does nothingYour attempt at doing nothing is commendable. You still have to dodge a tree falling.
Roll to dodge a tree:
5Not only you dodge the evil tree, but with all your strength, you pull the fellow bird to the safety.
---
Mitsubishi Galant: Does nothingYour attempt at doing nothing is commendable. You still have to dodge a tree falling.
Roll to dodge a tree:
6The tree falls on you. You were stronger. You're a Mitsubishi after all, not a Ford, or a Chevy.
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Info about Player Characters, Nonplayer Characters, Locations.
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/ ... edit#gid=0 (wait for update)